Regretfully Indifferent

Fight the Power. Stay Informed.

Tuesday, March 18, 2003



I've always hated trains. An interruption in my progress is all they seem, no real purpose. This particular train was no different. There it was, a swift metallic divider between myself and my destination. As each car passed I saw but a glimpse of the other side. A taunting device of this rumbling demon, I suppose. Vehicles were beginning to line up behind me, as if I were their leader and they awaited my action. We were all spitting and cursing industry for the delay. She was driving a Taurus. Newer style. Dark. Beautiful. The Taurus was nice, too. I couldn't tell if she was smoking or enjoying a sucker, but either would have been fine, I guess. She existed on the other side of the tracks, just as close to my goal as I was to hers. I pretended to fall in love with her, to keep myself entertained. I dreamed of our future together. Kids, cars, homes, and late-night movies by the fireplace, it was all included. Everything that I knew about her I had learned from split-second voyeuristic sessions between cars, and that was perfectly fine with me. I just filled in all the gaps. She was funny, intelligent, artistic, and emotionally supportive. She loved Chinese food and the funny shapes that tanning test stickers made if you moved them around mid-session. Sometimes when we were alone and quiet she would rest her hand on my arm and squeeze it periodically to let me know that she was still alive and still loved me. Few of life's true pleasures could be found outside of her company. As I traveled back to reality, I saw that her patience had peaked. The look on her face told me more than I wanted to know. She was leaving me. Her Taurus carried her away as she did a U-turn and fled to a more appropriate concourse. Every intangible piece of my soul chased after her, but love can rarely outrun a V6. Unable to give chase, I simply remembered the good times that we had as I prepared to recover from another heartbreak. And that is how I lived an entire life in four minutes. Realizing that my imagination is my one and only true love, I have decided that trains really aren't all that bad.

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